Hi, and welcome to Behind the Paddle Podcast with me, Paulson Victoria. Today, so on our socials, I put out a thing talking about QA's. You ask the questions and I answer them. So we shall see how that goes. I we got a lot of questions. A lot, which is amazing. Thank you guys for messaging all these questions in. I cannot wait to start on them. Um, obviously, I will be going on my lovely ADHD rants. I will try and not uh make this massive, but it's probably gonna be a two-parter because there are a lot of questions, and some of the questions are really deep in there. So we are going to be on many vids. Um, hopefully this weekend. Well, coming Friday tomorrow. Well, I record Thursdays, so um so yeah, we'll be on many vids, and there's a little bit something different if you're watching on Dark Fans, all seem to be many vids. I'm completely naked and I'm also in my workroom. So I thought, why not? Why not? So to the people on Spotify and things, this is gonna be the normal um stuff that happens. I'll mention it a few times maybe I'm naked in like other episodes at the start. But yeah, hopefully, hopefully that's not a terrifying image for you in your head. Um somebody being comfortable and naked while doing the podcast. But yeah, usually I'm in my lingerie, whereas for this one, why not? Um, so yeah. What what was the first question? Let me I have my laptop out because I am forever forgetful and I've also wrote wrote notes as well for some of the big questions as well. I've written stuff out. So the first one would be what would your ideal impact toy be? Oh, no, that's difficult because it really like I I think too much about things because I think about who I'm playing with, what they enjoy, and what the scene's gonna be. I'm looking at my impact toys and I'm like, what's my ideal one? But I have so many different hmm I I honestly want to say a wooden paddle, because you can use it in quite a few ways. Um and it can be light, uh it can be gentle, or you can be very mean and sinister. And the one paddle which I would probably use is let me go get it. So if anybody is just listening, I have a triteral travel size paddle in my hand, and it's dark and light wood. I don't know what exact wood it was, um, but I love it, and it's got um a crisscross pattern on it, and I love it, I really do like some ASMR for you. I love it, I really do because one side it's got the pattern on it, and the other side is just plain, and you can do so much with it, it's really, really fun, and it can make pretty marks. Um yeah, so I would honestly say the ideal impact toy would be my paddle. Um yeah, because like yeah, or maybe a flogger, hmm. But then you've got different types of floggers, you have so much when it comes uh in in terms of BDSM toys, because like a kitchen ladle could be a fucking toy, like so much you could use to your advantage around the house as well. So yeah, as long as you're safe with it. Um the next question is which toy in your collection always makes a client gulp? Now, if you are watching, you will be able to see some of my dildo collection. Now, the ones which you can see, they're they're they're kind of fine. I have one which it oh, I I love it, I really do. There's one which is a caterpillar, but it's also a butterfly, but it's curfew. That one's kind of scary. The clients do not expect that to be like, oh, that's actually usable, and I'm like, yeah, yeah. Uh I will show um on the camera, but um the one which properly makes uh people gulp is my horse cock. I have a Cinnovator horsecock, uh, which a client actually bought for me to use on them. And I have this thing where you buy me a toy, I'll happily use it on myself and send you a video. Um and I'm also um a switch as well, so that helps. Um yeah, so this is absolutely giant, and if people are watching, then you you see how giant it really is. It is bigger, bigger than my what, forearm? Is that right? Uh yeah, it's it's bigger than my thigh. Uh and bigger than my lower leg. So yeah, it's it's a good few inches. It's a good few inches. I don't think really anybody's gonna beat it. Um, unless you've got a little biggest cock. Um, but yeah, um yeah, it make it makes people gulp, it really does. And especially people who are vanilla and they come see me and they go, Oh my god, that actually fits in people. I'm like, yeah, yeah. If you go on my mini vid, you'll see me try it, and it just doesn't work. But yeah, the caterpillar and butterfly one is like, oh, it's so cute, so cute. I try and buy from small businesses and independent ones. So yeah. Um next question. Do you have any fear that your job will become obsta obstolete with the invention of new technology? Um so like I I do different sectors of sex work. So like I'll do phone chat, webcam. Um, I don't cam like on the daily. I used to when I was pregnant. Um, I used to cam from what like 12 till 5 o'clock and then 7 till midnight, maybe even afterwards. So it it really depends on I feel what sector of job um you are in in the sex work industry because I I think maybe my job has been affected by like OF and things. Um but new technology, I mean nothing can be somebody's touch. That's that's one thing which stands out is you are gonna hopefully if you find the right provider, get that connection and get what you are wanting from this service is an actual human. Like a robot can do it to some extent, but they're just a robot, you don't have they don't yeah, the the robots are getting really smart and I don't I I still think that people do find robots weird and taboo in the way of ooh, this person has um a robot girlfriend or something like that. Uh same with a sex doll, because with sex dolls you can create them to whoever and however the specifications you want. So I don't think it will impact my business as much overall, because I offer so many services, and so something if something dips, then I can make up for it in a different region. So like for example, in the phone chat community, there there was a lot, a lot of people. Um it's crazy how there's so many people who do phone chat these days, which is amazing, which is great. Um, but it was very it I it's still it's not I wouldn't say oversaturated, but there is a lot more competition, I want to say. I understand that in the sex work community some sex workers are like, oh, we're all sisters, but at the end of the day, we are we're all different, but we are competition at the same time. Um, and people can absolutely copy other people and slag other people off and talk to clients about other people and things like that. Um, this is all what I've experienced. Um so yeah, I remember during during COVID, yeah, there was a influx of webcamas, and oh my god, there was so many, and it was a lot. So you get your your clients get more to choose from, which especially if you the the client isn't a regular, because they've got more to choose from, they wanna they're sometimes they want to taste everything. Sometimes they will come into your room on on the group chat thing, if you're doing webcam, or they'll ring you and they'll just be in there for a few seconds and whatnot, and it might not be for them, they might uh see somebody who they fancy more, but they thought they wanted to try you out first, and yeah, it it it ends up being like a doggy dog world. Um, but in terms of new technology, I know that a few of my clients enjoy AI and they do that for free, um, or they pay little um compared to what they would pay if they did phone chat with me or if they paid me for a texting service. So yeah, it has changed in that way because some people are using AI more, and I've seen um we've we've talked about in a previous episode how some dominatrixes are using their own AI system to talk to clients, and uh whether that's free or um paid, they've created that and it's all about what's the word, not developing, but moving with the way of society and how technology is moving forwards and improving. It's the same way, for example, as pubs. Some didn't serve food, but now they have to in order to survive, or they do karaoke nights or drag queen nights, they have attractions, they have things that draw people in, and they have adapted to what society is now and what is the future. Because um, like pubs are just dying out in general, so they just have to adapt and they have to be like, oh, we're now a bar and restaurant or something, and we have like bands playing every other night and things. So it's the same with sex work, we just have to uh adapt and potentially think about new things, or yeah, we might drown, and it it sucks, but it is just how the world works in every career where sometimes you have to think of new things to be more relevant, so yeah. Uh I f I think overall there's no fear from me because I do a good few things and I adapt. Um, I absolutely do see a difference in my earnings. Um, if something has happened. Uh or like more people come on. Yeah, absolutely. Now, uh the way I've done these questions is I've done sort of a serious one and then not serious and then serious, sort of, sort of. So this one is about the worst food I've ate. Now I've answered this one before on like Instagram. Um, I have a personal Instagram which I use, and there is a behind the paddle one as well. So um I can't actually bloody remember what I put for this one. Well, to be fair, what I did recently was I attempted to make cookies, but I added too much uh backup and like they were very soapy, so I was doing my own cooking when it comes to uh worst no, uh no, no, I dispute that. I love my cooking and other people love my cooking. Um worst food. I'm not that picky really when it comes to food, and like because I I want to say because of the way I grew up, I'll eat anything on the plate. Um I I fucking hate peanut butter though. But I've learned to love some dishes with peanut butter in it because I can't really taste it that well, like the proper nutty. Um so yeah, I can't really remember what I originally put for this one, and I've been racking my brain ever since, and I'm just like, what is the worst food? Um but yeah, I'm not that fussy when it comes to food. Um probably just really shit pizza. I'll probably come back to this one because I do like to dine out. Um, the worst food actually. Um I eat my steak for all or blue. So if it's anything apart from that, worst food no. So the next question is how has work changed since you started doing it? Oh boy. So I started working uh when I was fifteen. I know, I know, I know. I've had so many lectures from other people, but um at that point in my life um I wanted to explore, and that's what I did. That is absolutely what I did at the age of 15. I started webcaming. So yeah, at the age of 15, I did webcaming, and I ended up doing so there was a little backstory. There was this virtual reality and still is, I believe, called Second Life, and you didn't need to show your ID or anything like that, and I was like, oh damn, I need to earn money, and then I realized there was like strip clubs and there was people having sex with the avatars uh that you created, so I was like, you know what? I can do this, and previously, I I want to say around about the age of 12, uh, there was Sex Etra, which was a series produced by Playboy, and it was on after midnight, and I'd seen Adult Babies, Pony Play, and I was very, very interested, and it actually taught me about the world at like age 12, and it was amazing, it was a very much eye-opener. From a young age, I was very much I like this, this is quite cool. Um, I think the webcaming I stopped within a year. Um, what else? And then at age of 17, I like stumbled upon intersex work from a friend who came through vanilla work and she did sex work and she did a bit of domming and escorting, and I was like, oh, cool. Um, and I went to like swinger clubs at the age of 17. I was cute, I had fires and pigtails in, so of course they're gonna let me in. They didn't ask for a tea or anything like that. I know. Shocking. Um, and of course the owners fancied me, so that that worked. So yeah, um what was it? I think it definitely has changed. I mean, from me being so young and absolutely a rookie, and I didn't really have that much of a mentorship in what to do or how to do things, and I think that's also part of the reason why I love educating people and doing workshops and teaching people how to actually survive in sex work and what the realities are in sex work, and it's one of the reasons why I love doing this podcast. Um so I think it it's changed in the way of I want to say most recently with like OnlyFans, where there's a lot more people doing it and it's a lot more um in this day and age, it's a lot more like oh yeah, okay, cool. And um with my partner, he told his parents recently what I do for work, and their response was ah, fair enough, because they understand that in this day and age that OnlyFans and sex work, it's very popular and prominent, and it's here, and we're here, and they are fine with that because it is an actual job, and society is getting a lot more better at accepting it. So, yeah, I'd say definitely OF. Like, there is a bunch of men um and women, everybody. There is still a bunch of people who are like, no, you shouldn't be doing this, and at the end of the day, it's our bodies, like there will always be hate. Like whenever I open up my Twitter, there is hate about a woman, usually, and it's disgusting. Uh yeah, it's either hate about a woman or LGBTQ plus in some way, and I still find it disgusting, and some days I just don't go on Twitter because it's disgusted disgusted me that much with how gross people can be and inhumane with how they talk about other people because you wouldn't really talk about your mum or your dad that way, or your siblings. Well, I should hope not, but you never know. Um I I wish it was more I wish people weren't assholes plain ass. Like it is accepted, like the people who bully other people doing sex work, they've accepted that the other person does sex work, but they just don't like it. So how it's changed, there's more acceptance over it, there is more of an uproar, which is amazing. Um, I've seen more workshops come out and more people teaching, which is good. I think there is still toxicity in some of the sex workers that are in the industry. Um, there's still like scammers and that sadly. Um our voice is getting heard, which is good. Um, I have been in the industry legally for eight years, but if I've been doing it for since I was 15, then a bit a wee bit longer. Um, which means we feel real old. Um, but yeah, I think it has changed quite a bit. Um I think there are a lot more people who go towards sex work for financial help. Um, it is the worst uh the economy has been in a long time, and people are really struggling to just live and put food on the table. So people have turned to selling feet picks, uh selling vagina pictures, and that's absolutely fine. It it sucks that it is uh like we'll come back to this at some point, um, in one of the questions because it relates to it. It sucks that sex work is and can be quick cash for some people. Um, some people still don't see it as a career, whether they're in sex work or out of sex work. Um, so some things have changed for the better and some things have changed for the worst. And you have to put in consideration the economy, you have to put in consideration political things that have happened. Um, because I know right now that the UK are thinking of putting in a abortion ban, um, similar to the US, and they are thinking about doing things uh with sex workers and the Online Safety Act, which I'm sure we'll get to at some point in an episode. So things have already changed, uh mainly because of political agendas. Again, it all comes down to poverty with people going into sex work for money. Um, and I feel like that is also why there has been an increase in people doing sex work, is because they just can't afford to live, which is really, really sad. And I've now put a downer on the podcast episode. But yeah, there's there's been some changes, alright. Um, because they've also there's also been some changes in like technology, you're like you can do so much nowadays. Um I was looking at I want to say, I don't think it was the Sybian, I think it was Motor Bunny. They have built a thing which goes into the controller, I think, um, where your partner can sit on the Motor Bunny, which is like a Sybian. So basically it's like a big vibrator, but you can also add dicks to it as well now, so it's great. I need to get one, but they're like a grand, but um, you can add it to the controller. So if like you're playing a game, if your controller is meant to vibrate at that time, or if like you die if you're playing a uh shooting game or whatnot, um, then your partner gets the vibrations, and like that's so cool. Um, so like a lot of things have changed in the world of sex work and sex and spiciness, and I mean you've got all these documentaries out nowadays as well, with like Olivia Atwood, um, and I think Catherine Ryan is in the process of doing one, I think. Um, I don't really watch that much TV. Um, but I try and like keep up with anything that's like sex worker and things. Um, so like you've got that media output as well. So there's a lot of things that have changed where that has helped speak about that sex work is a real job, but at the same time, it's had its real bad criticism because the shows have mainly been portrayed as get rich and whatnot, and like that's not really the reality, and there hasn't really been that much shown on how the reality and the poverty, and this is why some people go towards it. Like that it's only been like the good stuff, and the bad stuff hasn't been highlighted enough. So, yeah, once again, things have changed for better or for worse, but um how do you see a safe future for sex workers in an ideal world? Oh man, that's a question. I mean, my my dream is that I can well, in general, there can be a building dedicated to sex workers where they can come in and out and they can work and it can be safe, and it there can be like alarms uh which if like a client doesn't want to do a certain thing or if they're being an asshole for whatever reason, you can press that alarm and we can fucking chuck them out, and there will be a safety buddy system and everything like that. That that is what I would want in my lovely dream world, and I don't really think we're gonna get to that because we are just seen as scum basically by mainly politicians. So it sucks, it really, really does suck. That is what I would love in an ideal world where especially to help survivor, uh, survival sex workers um to have something like that. Because previously we've discussed the That there are like needle facilities. So, like people who do want to inject drugs into themselves, there is like a safe house they can do it in, and they can be watched by a medical team and given like clean needles and whatnot. And I don't understand how we can't have that as sex work as a safe place to work. Because if you listened back to the most recent episodes that I've produced um about Proceed Without Caution, there is so much in place to actually stop us from doing it safely. It's insane. And it is just against women. Um it very much is leaning towards why do you why do you hate women? Why? And that is something politicians can answer, but they choose not to. Not right now. Not in the next five years, maybe ten. But yeah, I I wish we had uh like maternity leave, sick pay. Um it would be easier to get life insurance, that would be fucking nice. Um I wish it would be easier to get mortgages, I wish it would be easier to get like loans from the bank and things. Something I everything really needs to have your job uh talked about on a lot of things, um, like housing and uh getting a quote unquote normal job, they will ask your previous experience and like do DBS checks and they will ask what have you done for work previously, and so yeah, I think I don't think safe is ever possible and yeah, it sucks because sometimes I think that the well obviously the politicians have done more harm um than good in the laws and the client clients can be cunts, they absolutely can be, but the policies and the laws need to be changed before anything can be safe. Um yeah, I would see a safe ideal um world where sex work was legalized, decriminalized. Um there was houses where we can work out of as groups and we could be looked after by somebody where like we're given like free condoms, free lube, um free health checks, uh what else? Free accommodation, or like something something little um to pay towards, and of course no shame. I think this will go towards one of the questions at the end, maybe in part two, because I know I've talked for like half an hour now, where if in the perfect world there wouldn't be any poverty and everybody would actually have human rights in talks of being properly way given a wage and being treated right and ha being able to actually have food on the table, not needing the necessities in life, then I think a lot of things in sex work would actually change. And yeah, we'll get to that in part two. Yeah, a safe future. It's something to dream about, it is. Um, especially if you listen to the previous two episodes about how the police and solicitors and social work deal with sex workers. That that was a fun episode. It was really hard not to cry. Next question is do you ever practice your work talk when you're at home? Um, so I do phone chat, so that's kind of like my practice. Um, in a way, I do not procrastinate, is that the right word? Um, over something, because usually if I work at home, uh like talk work, yeah. Usually if I talk work at home, then I just I'm nervous about it. So, like for example, if I haven't seen a client in like a week, then I'm a bit nervous about it because I feel a bit rusty. Because I'm used to having a client like every other day in some capacity, but um I know when I moved premises and I started working from home, um, I was very, very nervous because it wasn't the free bedroom that I was used to, it now is like the we bedroom. So yeah, if I practice my work talk at home, I think I would just get more nervous and I wouldn't be able to take myself seriously. Um but with uh phone chat, it helps a lot because the person isn't there in front of me, and I can be more free about it in a way. I mean, don't get me wrong, you still have to like file down what exactly they want and how to speak to them, but it keeps me not being rusty. So the next question was how does one get into your line of work? Is there a way to start but to be discreet and show no face? Okay, so this is this is probably the final question that I will do because it's gonna be quite long. No. Basically, somebody can recognize you from your hair from distinct facial details, or if you've got one toe bigger than the other, um, or like you've got a mole somewhere, like people can figure you out from that, people can figure out from like your hair colour and things. Like, I'd be fucked uh if I wanted to do no face. Um there will be clients who want to figure out who you are. There will be people out there, even if they're not clients actually, they want to figure out who you are, they want to find where you live, they want to know who you know, who your family members are. And like this isn't like worst-case scenario, but like I've uh been doxxed. I've been doxed with like my address, and I've been doxxed with like my full name. Yeah. Um and I know that there are other sex workers out there who are discreet and don't show a face, and they have been doxed, and they have been found out, and they have been stalked. So I would never ever encourage anybody to actually do this line of work. Um, based on the fact of you need to be a certain person to do it and to deal with it. And yes, it all comes down to the men that you're dealing with. It is not a oh you shouldn't do sex work because it's bad. No, you need to control the men who want sex workers. That's a whole problem in itself. Um, that's what I'm on about. LGPTQ, uh females, um, fucking amazing. Amazing. Love having them as clients. Uh men, they can be scary, they can be dangerous, and it is it can certainly turn into victim blaming when you being a sex worker isn't the problem. It's the clientele. Um so yeah. You can do sex work, absolutely, but there is no guarantee that you will not get found out by somebody. And I know that people who aren't in sex work or are or and people who are on like uh Twitter or Fet Life, the kinky version of Facebook, um, and they don't show their face. But I can tell who they are, um, whether I've met them or not, it in like in person. Um so yeah, would say be very careful. You absolutely can do this work, and you can go a good few years without getting recognized and things like that, but it might happen. It very much might happen. I know that when it comes to like phone numbers, if your phone number's being used for like Instagram, it comes up with like you might know or TikTok or Facebook. I know many times that people have messaged me and they're just like, Oh, I've actually found your Facebook, and I'm like, What? And they're like, Oh yeah, it just came up, like nearby friends, or like people you may know. And there is with technology these days, you can find somebody so easily, and it is scary, it is dangerous, and it can happen by accident. Um, I've had people, I've had clients message me on my Facebook asking for a booking, and I'm like, are you for real? Like, this has made me very uncomfortable that you've chosen to find my Facebook and okay, you're not getting a session. I'm officially no. Um, so yeah, I would say you can attempt to do it discreetly, but there is no guarantee that you would actually be discreet enough. Yeah, it sucks, it does, but if like you're in uni or you have close friends, they might um figure out because again with technology especially it can dox you and like it it doesn't mean to, but it can because like on my personal Instagram, um I get followers from like submissives now and stuff, and I'm like, huh, how did they get that? Um but I am actually also tagged in behind a paddle, but yeah, um but now you it is a possibility that you will get found out. Um if it's just feet pics might be a little bit different, but at the end of the day if you have like an Instagram or a something Twitter, something that you do post your porn on, because feet pics is porn. Um showing people the back of your tonsils, that's porn. Some like everything can be porn, but if you're doing some sort of sex work and say, for example, um you've got sandals on one day, and one of like your work colleagues they secretly wank off to your feet and they see your feet, um, and they connect the dots. Like, you know, there's a lot of things that can happen. And oh my god, I remember um walking down the street and somebody asked for directions, and they gave me the look. Um, they were in a van and it was a company car, and they would they gave me the look of I know who you are. And the guy actually had balls big enough to be like, Do I know you from somewhere? And I was like, Yes, probably porn. And he was like, Yes, and I was like, Yes, yes, and like it's happened before. I I I wouldn't recommend coming into it if you do not know the risks and potentially somebody finding out. So yeah. Uh that is where we're gonna end today's episode. This has been such a lovely QA. There will be a part two to the QA as well. So yeah, thank you very much for listening. You can, if you enjoyed the podcast, you can send us a tip. You can subscribe where or follow us wherever you're listening. Um, you will see me on many vids, dark fans, Instagram, Twitter. You will be able to find my own personal links all through uh behind the paddle as well. Um and yeah. I hope you're having a fabulous day and it's goodbye. Bye!